On play, creating, hobbies, & exploring
my thoughts, journey, & unsought advice
When I completed my undergraduate thesis in 2021 and university no longer seemed like an endless journey, it felt like I had heaved a huge sigh of relief after holding my breath for so long. All my life until then, academic excellence was something I had chased interminably. I had the view that it dictated how valuable I was and it was a glimpse into how successful I’d be. Of course, the past three years have shown me that was all rubbish, but that’s not what I’m writing about.
One morning in September 2021, I woke up with absolutely nothing on my to-do list. With my final exams written, my final project completed and approved by my supervisor, and no classes, all that was left to do was defend my project. But until then, nothing demanded my attention and this freedom felt strange. I didn’t know what to do with my time and energy. Then one of my friends came to my room, similarly plagued with the burden of free time and no tasks to channel our energy into after hectically doing so for the past few months.
So we got out a plain sheet of A4 paper and my stash of nail polish and decided to “play”. We sat on the floor and with different colours of nail polish, we painted our finger pads and placed them on the paper, making a monstrosity of an artwork. But it was so much fun. For that little window in our life, just before post-university problems such as career paths, unemployment, and adulting in general and in Nigeria reared their heads, life was good. We felt like we had earned the right to do something for our sake, and not productivity's sake, after surviving four years in that hellscape of a school.
Recently, I’ve been thinking about the concept of play. About how the declaration, “Let’s go and play” fades from our vocabulary as we grow older. I’ve been wondering what it means to “play” as an adult—a word that’s mostly associated with childhood. And I recall this moment as one of the times I’ve “played” as an adult. I and my friend sat on the floor and created art, unbothered by how it looked and unaware of any problems existing outside that moment. Unbothered by the fact we were intentionally choosing to do something that wasn’t considered productive at our big age. I smile every time I think of this moment and it makes me wonder if it was the start of a renewed desire to make space for play in my life. But as we grow older, play manifests as hobbies we make time for rather than spontaneous playtime sessions with our friends outside.
On finding activities that bring you joy
It was after I graduated and found myself in a season with a lot of time and nothing to do that I realised I needed to fill my time with something. I had already quit most social media at this point which meant the chunks of time that endless scrolling would have swallowed were available to me. At the time, reading and watching movies and shows were the only hobbies I had. But there were times, I didn’t feel like doing either.
Then I remembered how I liked to make things when I was younger. I created birthday cards for my family, I made ugly contraptions with cardboard, glitter glue, and gel pens, and I made beaded jewellery. All of these faded away the older I got. But then I had time on my hands and decided this would be a good time to explore things I wanted to try.
Origami
I started with origami. I don’t know why. Maybe because it requires minimal materials and there’s an abundance of origami YouTube videos. It was exciting to see what I could make from just folding paper and I felt so cool when I had done some designs enough times to make them from memory. My favourite designs were bows and butterfly bookmarks. Sometimes origami was hard and frustrating, and I abandoned some projects that I couldn’t figure out. But I discovered how much easier things are when you take a break and come back.
Collaging
Then I explored collaging because I thought it would be another fun activity that involved creating with my hands. Cutting up random words and pictures and assembling them to create a finished piece that meant something to me was exciting. I also tried digital collaging and it was a flop (but I’m looking to try it again). It was at this point I realised how much joy crafty activities bring me.
Morning walks & flowers
Still, in 2021, I stumbled on another activity that brought me joy but involved observing rather than creating. I and my sisters started taking morning walks at that time when the sun is rising, the air is clean, and the world is just waking up. It felt as if I was breathing in a new day before it was polluted by negative thoughts and the rush of everyday life. I discovered that walking is amazing and deserves all the hype it gets. It also gave me a chance to explore and get to know my neighbourhood in a way I hadn’t done since I moved here in 2006. I found shortcuts to places and roads I didn’t know existed. I also saw pretty houses I never saw before which catered to my mild obsession with aesthetically pleasing homes and interior design. There was this one pretty little house with so many beautiful potted plants I loved to walk by.
Another thing walking did was help me discover my interest in flowers. I never gave them much thought but as I walked, I started noticing all the different flowers in my neighbourhood. I noticed their colours, their scent, their texture, and where they grew. Sometimes, I’d pluck them, take them home and place them in a DIY vase, googling ways to make them stay alive longer and learning their names. I was so fascinated by them and fascinated by how this interest suddenly surfaced. Where had it been all my life?
Crochet
After some time, life happened the way it does and I didn’t have as much time on my hands as I did after graduating. Creating things and exploring activities that brought me joy took a seat on the last row of my mind. It wasn’t until the start of 2023 that I found myself with time on my hands again. Life was hard and I was struggling. And although books did wonders for me at that time and got me through so much, I was looking to actively “make” something and crochet was on my mind. I had a friend who started crocheting the year before and she talked about how it did wonders for her.
I was excited to learn something new. I got my crochet materials and I remember watching videos of experienced crocheters, the way their hands moved so quickly and in sync with the hook, through the correct hole and I wondered if I would ever reach that point. It seemed impossible at the time because I was struggling to chain. But I did it and crochet has been so fun. The possibilities are endless: I can make clothes—without needing to know how to sew—decor, scrunchies, bookmarks, storage items, etc.
It’s so fulfilling to create something from start to finish (no matter how long it takes) and it’s forced me to learn patience and appreciate the process because to create your finished product, literally every stitch matters. I’ve also fallen in love with pairing crocheting with other activities I like such as re-watching cringey old movies and listening to podcasts or audiobooks and it’s such a wonderful combination and gives me so much joy.
Drawing
I’ve always wanted to do some form of fine arts like drawing or painting. But I somehow made myself believe that each person was only entitled to a singular medium of creative expression and I already had writing. Plus making art didn’t come unusually easy to me like it did for the people with natural artistic inclinations and talent, so I believed it wasn’t meant for me. It wasn’t until this year that I started exploring drawing and realised how much I enjoy it. I also now know that I can have as many creative outlets and mediums as I please. I’m allowed to explore anything that piques my interest and I shouldn’t limit myself.
“I can’t be a singular expression of myself. There’s too many parts, too many spaces, too many manifestations, too many lines, too many curves, too many troubles, too many journeys, too many mountains, too many rivers, so many”
— Can I Hold the Mic (interlude) by Solange
I also now know that it’s okay to suck at things. I can learn—the entirety of life is a learning process after all—and I don’t have to be good at something to do it. Enjoying it is more important than the quality of what I produce. Now, I allow myself to “copy-draw” like my nephew says, even though before I used to think if I had to look at something to inspire and guide me to draw, it didn’t count.
Pot painting
This is something I’ve done only three times with my friends but I enjoyed it every time I did it. The first time I visited this place that’s basically a haven for plant lovers, and I talked and painted a pot with my friend, not worrying about creating a masterpiece, I was shocked at how fulfilled I felt from it—which isn’t shocking to me now that I know I love to create and do things with my hands—and how calming it was.
On making space for these things that bring you joy
As I get older and realise many things, one of them is “How do you expect to enjoy life when you don’t do the things you enjoy?” And “How do you do that when you don’t even know what these things are?” I’ve seen the way my day can change for the better when I read a good book or crochet and listen to a good fiction podcast or draw or take a walk and photograph flowers or the sky, or do one of the things that brings me joy and rejuvenate me. It’s exciting to know that there’s so much out there I haven’t tried that I’d like to because filling your days with things that are genuinely fun for you can make a huge difference in your life. The people you spend time with and the things you spend your time doing have such a huge effect on the quality of your life and these are things that are, most times, largely in our control.
But as adults operating in a capitalist society that prioritises productivity and profit, it’s not easy to ensure we actually do these things. However, I’ve realised the role intentionality plays in making sure you make space for the things that bring you joy and the things that feed your soul. We’re constantly told to schedule “serious” and “productive” tasks but blocking out time and scheduling hobbies and fun activities make sure we actually get around to doing them rather than waiting to feel like doing them. For instance, scheduling crochet time or drawing time—even if it’s once a week—is better than nothing and ensures I’m intentional about doing things that make me happy. Even creating themed days like ‘sudoku Sundays’, which I suggested to a friend who likes to play sudoku, or ‘walking Wednesdays’ which I’d like to try out, makes space for play and joyful activities rather than leaving them up to chance and never doing them or doing them once on a whim and never again.
Like that Annie Dillard quote says:
“How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.”
Of course, as with most things in life, this is a process and I still find it difficult to consistently show up. But I’m trying and giving myself grace.
Further thoughts
While I think it’d be absolutely great for everyone to make time to play and explore and do things that aren’t necessarily productive (in the way society views and obsesses over productivity) but feel good and bring them joy, it’s unattainable for the vast majority. I think a lot about this: How can you make art, or make space for hobbies when you’re starving? Or when your country is at war? Or when all the money you have, and don’t have, is going into keeping a roof over your head, or healthcare, or education, because basic amenities are not basic but a luxury?
Then I think of this quote:
“The wretched of the earth are not meant to make art, we are supposed to be too busy surviving.”
— Drinking from Graveyard Wells by Lisa Ndlovu.
When you’re channelling all your energy into survival, how are you meant to stow time away to explore, play, or create? The time that could be channelled into productive ways to stay alive longer. For so many of us, maintaining a hobby in this economic and political climate is expensive and a luxury. It’s frustrating trying to bring joy into your life when the system is hell-bent on breaking you down as you break your back to survive.
And I know rest is resistance and we can try to be intentional and make do with what we have. But that won’t change the fact that the system the world operates by is the problem. Life is hard and maybe if we existed in a society where people didn’t have to worry about the most basic human needs, more people would be able to explore, create, and live happier lives.
But that’s not our reality. And maybe one day we’ll bring the system down and every single person will have a chance to play and do things for the fun of it and not for productivity's sake and the world will be a better and brighter place for that. But as we work toward that, we have to keep trying our best to intentionally spend our minutes, hours, and days the way we want, when we can. And when a bunch of people come together for the sake of this, like my friend and I did in 2021, it’s such a beautiful thing.
Thank you for being here. Nostalgia Trip is free to read and will continue to remain so. However, if you ever feel moved to support my creative journey by tipping me, that will be greatly appreciated :)
Loved this read AS USUAL . I think it is so so important for us to be curious about the world around us. And that curiosity will then birth hobbies and play and things that, as you said, just exist in our lives to bring us joy. I also hate that hobbies are expensive and inaccessible to everyone. Everyone deserves to play. It reminds me of that viral tweet that went something like this: rich people being able to do art for a living may be a reflection of their privilege but it seems that it shows that all humans, if given the resources will always choose art.
"Then I remembered how I liked to make things when I was younger. I created birthday cards for my family, I made ugly contraptions with cardboard, glitter glue, and gel pens, and I made beaded jewellery. All of these faded away the older I got. But then I had time on my hands and decided this would be a good time to explore things I wanted to try. "
FM, don’t you dare lose it again even if the world wants to snatch it from you. Goof off with it. so happy you came back home to yourself. It literally brought a beautiful smile on my face as i read it.