I’m a K-Drama girlie & I’m not ashamed
a brief history, my thoughts & recommendations!
I. A brief history
For the longest time, I’ve had an uncomfortable relationship with K-Drama.
My first encounter with it was during my senior secondary school. Probably SS1 (grade 10).
Watching movies and shows in the huge common room was one of my favourite experiences in school. We would arrange the couches like lego blocks, attaching ends to beginnings to make extra long seating spaces. We’d also get chairs from the prep room (a study space) and some people would sit on the floor. We’d turn the lights off, close the curtains, set the TV volume high enough to give a cinematic effect, but not so high as to lure the housemother out of her room.
There was something beautiful about watching a show with about 70 girls huddled in a room. We had a common goal. At times like these, the social hierarchy of boarding school was mostly diluted. A senior sat next to her junior and giggled with her because of a scene from the TV. It was the ultimate girls’ night where we forgot about the existence of boys at the other side of the school.
One day, we had access to the TV and nothing to watch. We had spent hours watching Hit the Floor. We had probably gone through all the cringe, illegally downloaded movies and DVDs we could. We had free hours ahead of us and access to the TV. We couldn’t waste it. We had reached rock bottom, so someone suggested the impossible, the laughable: that we tried K-Drama.
This was an unpopular suggestion for two reasons. First, the people who loved K-Drama and talked about it were a friend group that were low on the social ladder. Somehow, they were marked as uncool, and by association, so were their interests, including K-Drama. We found their liking for it weird and laughable.
Second, and this is something I realised long after secondary school, internalised colo(nial) mentality and belief in white supremacy. We saw western media as superior and anything else not produced in Hollywood and made in another language was inferior; not to be taken seriously.
Of course, both these reasons are stupid and owed to childhood small mindedness, ignorance and plain meanness. But with disdain, looking down on it, we watched City Hunter and got introduced to the K-Drama colossal that is Lee Min-ho. And when I say we fell. We were a squealing, giggling mess, moaning “Kim Nana” alongside Lee Min-ho’s character. If our past selves from a few hours before saw us, they’d be thoroughly embarrassed. But we enjoyed it and simultaneously looked down on it.
That was the first and last time I watched a K-Drama. Until my first year in uni when I was sad and bored out of my mind. I started watching Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo, and it was the perfect form of escapism. The drama, the chaos, the long episodes, the eight princes and one girl??? I was hooked.
I realised I was enjoying it and I remember mentioning it to two of my friends on the group chat. I don’t recall exactly what they said, but it was along the lines of: um, girl, no, that’s weird. What are you doing? And that undid it all. So even though I enjoyed it, I refused to admit it and a part of me still looked down on it. And it continued that way for a while.
It didn’t help the way Nigerians generally perceived K-Drama. Aside from the aforementioned belief that western media is superior, there’s also the way society, men especially, look down on things women love—like the romance genre for instance. As women form most K-Drama audience, we regard it as less than, just as we look down on women’s interests and preoccupations, perceiving them as unrealistic or lacking in substance, quality or depth.
I’ve long dealt with my bias. When I realised I was the one at fault for perceiving people and their interests as lesser than and as I acknowledged my internal colo mentality, I allowed myself enjoy K-Drama. It’s a source of joy for me and I don’t need to explain this to anyone (even though that’s what I’m doing right now, haha).
And to people who’ve tried out K-Drama and don’t enjoy it: you can dislike something without looking down on it or thinking you’re better than the people who enjoy it :)
II. Thoughts on K-Drama
Stuff I love:
The music
K-Drama music supervisors are doing something right. Music is an amazing tool in film and when it’s used properly, it takes everything up a notch. Although not all K-Drama shows use music intentionally, I’ve noticed a couple which do it so well. They have specific songs attached to specific emotions, scenarios, or characters. Whenever you hear a snippet of the song, you’ll be immediately transported back to the show, feeling all the feelings, remembering the heartbreak, the fear, the love.
My favourite, Scars leave beautiful trace, a song by Car, the Garden—who has such a beautiful voice, by the way, is from Alchemy of Souls and has been on repeat for months. It’s not just that it’s a lovely song, it’s also that it transports me back to Daeho—the magic, the drama, the romance,
The trauma (??)
My sisters and I always joke about how nobody has as much trauma as the male lead in a K-Drama. Countless times, I’ve asked myself, all this trauma for only one person? But I’ve discovered the reason is to make the male lead pitiable (I’ve found myself rooting and falling for men I’d scoff at in real life). It’s also a welcome break from Hollywood’s obsession with girls with dead parents and trauma.
Here’s an example: The male lead found his sister’s dead body at the family’s business site after seeing his father run out of the place. He told the police this and his father got sent to prison. A few days later, he found his mother’s body, after she killed herself, in the same room as his sister’s. He was just 8 years old ;(
The child actors
I vaguely remember a Twitter conversation where someone commented on the quality of the acting of K-Drama child actors and one Twitter banger boy swore with his chest that it was a lie (cue what I said about colo mentality and belittling women’s interests). I wonder if he’s ever watched a scene with a K-Drama child actor to vehemently oppose like he did. Anyway, probably because of the competitive nature of the industry, these kids know the assignment and always deliver. They reach into your heart and squeeze. I’m always in awe of how well they deliver their lines, convey strong emotions, and how dedicated they are to shedding tears.
The romance
It’s no secret that K-Drama does their romance well. They set us up with attractive male leads who are obsessed with the female lead and ready to sacrifice everything for her. If you’re craving romance that you’ll get lost in and will deliver all the mushiness, all the cringe lines, the eye staring, the messy love triangles, the boy falling hard and fast for the girl who doesn’t give him the time of the day, you’ll find this and so much more in K-Drama. All in different shades and different frequencies. You might also find yourself a couple of fictional boyfriends, too.
The comedy
I’ve noticed how they infuse comedy in their shows (though not all of them). Even in the most serious shows and serious circumstances, there’s a comedic character or element or an absolutely insane conversation thrown in. I found it weird at first, but I’m so here for it now.
The heartbreak
I never finished Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo. I could smell the impending heartbreak and knew I wouldn’t be able to take it. I’m a crier and have shed many tears for books, movies and shows. But the way K-Drama can wrench your heart out? If you ever choose to watch Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo or The Red Sleeve, proceed with caution.
Long episodes
I love how long the episodes are. They’re typically 45 minutes to one hour long. A short show might have 12 episodes, but on average, they are about 14 to 21 episodes long. This means they’re perfect for escapism. When I’m feeling down, I can lose myself in K-Drama.
If you’ve gotten weary of sex scenes being thrown in or they make you uncomfortable, K-Drama is the place for you. There’s hardly ever any.
I like that it’s easy to find K-Drama with older women as lead characters. I love it every time I find a character that is a child free woman in her thirties or forties living her best life.
Other thoughts:
As with anything translated, there’s the tendency for some parts of the message to get lost in translation. Sometimes, there isn’t the perfect English version of a word or a phrase. Other times, a lack of understanding of South Korean culture or slang is an obstacle to getting the context of the message.
Also, because of the average number of episodes K-dramas have, sometimes the stories go on for longer than necessary and the show would’ve benefitted from a shorter runtime.
Sometimes, I don’t enjoy some shows as much as I thought I would. Other times, there are plot holes that make me wonder if the writers really thought some things through. But generally, I have a swell time.
III. Recommendations!
Here are some of my favourite K-dramas that are close to my heart and I 100% recommend:
Strong Woman Do Bong Soon
Do Bong Soon lives in Dobong-dong, in Dobong-gu. She comes from a line of strong women, literally. Supernatural strength is passed down through the women in her family (and conveniently skips the men). Bong Soon’s dream is to work at Ainsoft, a leading game developing company in Seoul, where she can create a video game about a strong woman inspired by her own life. As fate has it, when Bong Soon is beating up a bunch of thugs who were picking on an old man, she meets Ahn Min Hyuk, the CEO of Ainsoft. CEO Ahn offers her a job as his bodyguard because he’s been getting threatening calls and messages. She starts her job as his bodyguard and a lot goes down.
This show is very close to my heart. I think it’s because it’s the first K-Drama I fell in love with, and it had me at a woman beating up men. The show gave me my first glimpse into South Korea’s frighteningly sexist society. I saw it in how normal it was for men to treat Bong Soon like she was nothing. They raised their hand to hit her, literally pushed her around, and made disgusting comments. But we get the satisfaction of watching her beat them up and even though the graphics are cringey and dated, it’s amazing.
The romance gives what it’s supposed to. There’s a love triangle between Do Bong Soon, Ahn Min Hyuk and Bong Soon’s friend from school, Gook Du. I love that the romance is mushy and makes you smile and that CEO Ahn is so open and dramatic about his feelings for Bong Soon. Plus, there’s an amazing female friendship between Bong Soon and her best friend Kyung-shim.
There are also multiple subplots with a serial killer on the loose, toxic rich family dynamics, a fight against thugs, etc. Sometimes it seems like you’re watching more than one show, but in the best way possible. I’m a rewatcher and I watch this at least once a year. It has my heart.
Summer Strike
Yeo-reum lives in Seoul, the capital of South Korea and works in publishing. Her boss is a misogynistic jackass who verbally assaults and constantly uses her. After a life-changing event occurs, Yeo-reum realises this isn’t the life she wants. She quits her job, sells most of her possessions until they all fit into a bag and goes to a little seaside town, Angok. She decides she will not work at all, hence the title summer strike.
The show is a bit slow paced, but it’s so beautiful. It emphasises the importance of community, friendship, and chosen family.
There’s a beautiful female friendship that melted my heart, and the romance was subtle but so wholesome. The male lead character is a quiet, kind, and smart librarian who has more than enough trauma to make you sympathise with him. Although it’s about the everyday life of occupants of a small town, there’s some mystery thrown in there.
Yeo-reum spends her days reading books in the library, taking walks, and adopting healthy new habits and it was so lovely to watch. I think some things that really appealed to me were the role books, and the library played, how anti-consumerist the story was (we know all of Yeo-reum’s clothes throughout the show. It reminds us of how little we need to survive) and how it emphasised slow living.
Hello, My Twenties
This show follows five roommates and their lives in college. They all have very different lives and are studying different courses in different years. They go through a lot together: family issues, financial issues, trying to find love, deep buried trauma. We also get a glimpse into their everyday life and see the disagreements and the bonding.
I’m a sucker for aesthetics and their apartment was so tiny and cute. I’m also a sucker for female friendships and it was at the centre of the show. Plus, I loved the theme song. It was such a beautiful show and I don’t hear people talk about it enough. Though season 1 and 2 are quite different, I liked them both.
Birthcare Centre
The birthcare centre is a place for women to ease their way back into life postpartum. They come with their kid(s) and partner and they take classes, practice yoga, and interact with other mothers. There are cliques. There’s the perfect mother who has been at the centre more than once, and it’s all messy because motherhood and humans are messy.
The main character is a successful career woman who had a kid in her forties. She struggles with finding her feet after giving birth, wondering if she’s a good mother, trying to decide if she should go back to work or not. And though she has a supportive husband, it’s all so hard.
This show is one that focuses on motherhood and all its complexities, which isn’t easy to find. There’s enough drama to keep you hooked and enough perspectives to make you empathise with the different struggles of different mothers.
Partners for Justice/ Investigation Couple
This show follows Eun Sol, a newbie prosecutor born into wealth, and Baek Beom, a forensic doctor with over ten years of experience, working together to solve crimes. Each episode usually comes with a new case for the duo to solve and that’s where the thrill is—trying to figure out who the murderer is or who is responsible for what went down. There are plot twists and hidden motives and although you might guess the culprit wrong more than once, you can always count on Baek Beom to bring to light whatever secret is hidden.
Baek Beom is my favourite character. He’s a brooding, uptight, and constantly annoyed man with his unique trauma, but you can’t help but love him. Plus, he’s amazing at his job and he taught me the phrase ‘naga!’ which means get out, because he was always shouting at people to get out of his autopsy room.
Season 2 is just as good as the first Season and brought in another (questionable?) male character who you can’t help but love.
Alchemy of Souls
In the fictional country of Daeho, mages possess the power to control the energy of heaven or earth. Or more simply, can cast spells. The alchemy of souls is forbidden sorcery that allows souls to switch bodies. When someone does this, they become a soul shifter that needs to feed on people’s souls to avoid running wild—basically becoming a zombie.
Nak-su, a badass sorceress and assassinator, is on the brink of death and performs the alchemy of souls to stay alive, but she accidentally enters the body of Mu-deok, a weak and blind girl who is sold by her family. She crosses paths with Jang Uk, whose family is part of some of the most powerful mages in Daeho. For reasons unknown to him, his father closed off his inner gate when he was young, stopping him from being able to use his magic. Eventually, Nak-su, or Mu-deok, becomes Jang Uk’s master, hoping to help him unlock his powers and train him so she can gain her freedom.
The level of world-building in this thing was insane. The characters were likeable, Nak-su/Mu-deok was amazing and for someone who doesn’t like action, I loved the fighting scenes. They were so cool and made me wish I knew martial arts or how to wield a sword. There’s also a cute and subtle romance and some bromance.
I was hesitant to watch this show because of all the hype it got, but it was so worth it. Note that I’m specifically recommending season 1. I couldn’t watch season 2, I felt it was a violation of season 1. In fact, I act as if episode 20 of season 1 and the entirety of season 2 don’t exist. Plus, I’m still obsessed with the song Scars leave beautiful trace by Car, the Garden.
Here are a few others that I enjoyed and are too good not to mention:
✿ Celebrity
✿ Reply 1998
✿ Yumi’s Cells
✿ The Red Sleeve
✿ Mr Queen
✿ Extraordinary Attorney Woo
That’s it! I’d love to hear from you so talk to me in the comments or by replying this email. Let me know your thoughts on K-Drama. Do you watch it? Do you have any recommendations? Do you hate it? Are you indifferent? Let me know!
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"I think it’s because it’s the first K-Drama I fell in love with, and it had me at a woman beating up men." this sentence was so real, LMAO!!! I am not a K-drama girlie at all, I recently met a comrade who is one and has been for slightly over a decade now, and she talked to me about it and how they were constructed and how they changed over the years to cater to a more western audience. The bit where you talk about colo mentality is so true because, K-drama and K-pop became worthy of attention the moment westerners started to find it cool. This happens all the time, cultural artefacts become cool only when the West decides so and it truly tells a lot about how the West has been perceiving itself as the beacon of reason and truth for everything! As for your recs, "Summer Strikes" really spoke to me (I mean, the moment it's about community, bonding frendship/kinship and slow living which is something the global majority has been doing since the end of time, I am sold! - see, even slow living has now been seen as cool because the West said so!). It will deffo be my first ever K-drama I'll dab into! Thank you for your recs!
oooh I loved reading this, i especially looking forward the recommendation. I love to say that I was into Kdrama waaaaay before it became a thing becaude one of my teenage bestie was a die hard fan. circa 2006-2008 I use to got her house and we'd watch them, back when you had to download the substitles in another file and do some manipulation to add it to the images. It wasn't as available as today with Netflix and other similar platforms. I liked your recommendations. Hello my twenties is really on my top 3 because it deals with difficult themes women deal with on a regular basis that are not often portrayed in the other more idealistic/romantic drama. Birthcare center is the last i've watched and I loved it for the same reason. I was pleasantly surprised really. Like you I love that they often have older women as main characters. There's also one called " lost in the city" or something like that, I liked the way it was filmed " documentary" style and i loved that they were a bit more sex than usual😅 this comment is too long now, but i'll check your other recommendations. Thanks!