'Halloween Is Demonic'

What comes to your mind when you think of Halloween?

When I think of Halloween, my mind immediately time travels to the night of October 30, 2016.

It was a Sunday evening and according to our boarding school timetable, we were meant to be observing prep time. But that never worked out well on Sundays. This was why instead of studying for our WAEC examinations like ideal final-year secondary school students should, my friends and I were in the common room talking about a movie I don’t remember. Well, my friends were talking and I listened half-heartedly as I laid on the couch and fought cramps.

One of my other friends, the artistic one, along with another classmate was doing something creative and artistic for Halloween. They walked by the common room occasionally with their materials in hand.

Now, there’s nothing eventful about any of this. It’s the events that occur after.

I was in class the next morning when someone called me and some of my friends out because the Principal wanted to see us. Our school wasn’t the ‘go to the Principal’s office because you did something wrong’ kind of school. There were many tiers of discipline—including our very efficient and dedicated disciplinarian/Igbo teacher who was always excited to exercise power over us— before the Principal came into the picture. So this was shocking.

Also, this new Principal wasn’t like the rest. First, he was Black. The first in a sea of white men in my six years of being in that school. He was also Nigerian but apparently lived in England originally. And he hated our class and didn’t hide it. So we spread rumours that his British accent was fake and he learned it from a fifteen-minute YouTube video.

When we got to the office, everyone I was with the night before was there. The details are irrelevant but in summary, what happened was our House Mother (or matron, whatever you call it) was in a dicey mood the previous night. She wrote down the names of people in the common room, including those walking past the moment she stepped out of her room (like the Halloween artists) and reported us for making noise and disrupting prep time.

I can’t remember if we wrote statements, but the Principal discovered some of the people there were making art to celebrate Halloween and delved into the horrors of the holiday. He said, I’m paraphrasing, you don’t know the things people do overseas in the name of Halloween. He said it was dangerous, demonic, horrible and involved graveyards.

So in essence, we were going to be punished for making noise and celebrating Halloween.

Now, there were levels of punishment in my secondary school, obviously. The school occasionally attempted detention (it never worked). There was helping the kitchen staff clear up after lunch which was the default and most popular punishment. And there was the standard suspension and expulsion.

But in between was the infamous ‘in-house suspension.’ It was bad and a big deal, but not as bad or as big a deal as a suspension. Your parents would probably not find out about it unless a meddling teacher snitched on you.

While your peers were in class, dressed in their starched white and grey uniforms, ties, blazers, and socks and shoes, you’d be in your checkered day wear and slides or slippers, sweeping and mopping the school surroundings (specifically where other people could see you).

In-house suspensions were originally significant. They weren’t frequent and you must have done something substantial like insulting a teacher or sneaking in contraband items like an electronic device (and being caught), then it’d be announced during an assembly to the collective gasp of students and the head-shaking of staff.

But with the coming of the British-Nigerian man, in-house suspensions were given out like party packs at a kid’s birthday party.

So my friends and I stretched our hands out and collected it. We changed and began cleaning. Some people panicked; the leftover fear of what the punishment used to be hovering in the air. But I found the whole situation hilarious because what did we do?

About two hours later or so, our punishment was over, we changed back to our uniforms (which was deeply laughable, if you‘re going to punish us, do it well yunno) and went back to class, no longer outlaws. It was over like it didn’t happen. A glitch in the matrix. And my friends and I learned to never celebrate Halloween or anything demonic ever again! Lmao, please 😂

My friends and I bring it up sometimes when we’re reminiscing about the absurdity that was secondary school. That night partially inspired one of my favourite short stories I’ve written, Wink Murderer, which gives Halloween, scary boarding school story vibes and it’s fun.

I’ve had a penchant for scary stories since I was young so also when I think of Halloween, I remember how excited young me was to watch Halloween episodes of my favourite shows like Phineas and Ferb or The Wizards of Waverly Place, etc. that would start airing around this time. I also remember watching Halloweentown every single year.

As a child, that was my way of celebrating Halloween in a country that at best doesn't acknowledge the existence of the holiday and at worst, brands it as demonic just like the wise British-Nigerian Principal said.

I randomly thought about an old Nollywood-themed Halloween party. How cool would that be? Dressing up as Mamiwaters and Karashikas and one of Patience Ozokwor’s scary characters or just a badass Nollywood babe and all that.

Also, I’ve been listening to ‘You First’ by Paramore a lot recently. And though the song is about revenge, being petty and karma, it gives me Halloween vibes because of this line I really like that goes, ‘I’m living in a horror film, where I’m both the killer and the final girl’.

‘You First’ by Paramore

I’ll probably celebrate Halloween this year by rewatching Scream, parts 1-5, to pay homage to Neve Campbell, the ultimate final girl 💀. Or rewatch Halloweentown? I don’t know.

So that’s it! I’m curious to know what comes to your mind when you think of Halloween in your childhood. How about now? Do you celebrate? Is it demonic? Are you indifferent? Let me know in the comments or feel free to reply directly to this email.

Check out last month’s edition of The Reading Nook for spooky read recommendations for Halloween if you missed it and I’ll be back in your inbox soon.

Thank you and bye! <3